My Articles

My articles provide you with a collection of interesting and relevant insights into a number of life-related topics, aimed at developing your YOU-Q and helping you find your Inner Winner.  Browse the articles for the information you need to regain control of your life.

Over the course of my career, I have often been asked by print and radio journalists to give my professional opinion on a variety of topics. You can read these articles on the magazine page and listen to the interviews I have given on the radio page of Claire in the Media. They make for interesting reading and listening.

A yearlong time-blocked calendar is possibly the most useful tool you can use to ensure that you have time to pay attention to ALL the different aspects of your life (physical, occupational, financial, interpersonal, intrapersonal, spiritual, environmental and medical) and so live the fully integrated life which leads to optimal health and wellbeing.

We often hear people talk about the “work-life balance.” It’s an interesting phrase because it implies that work is separate from life. It also implies that we can balance the two. But think about it… On the one side of the scale there is work, sitting all on its own and on the other side of the scale there is the physical, mental, spiritual, environmental, interpersonal and intrapersonal aspects of life which all get dumped together as “life”. The imbalance is obvious – one aspect of life versus all the other aspects of life - and yet we still aim to give an equal amount of time to both sides. It can’t be done - and striving for it just sets us up for failure. It’s the old traditional linear way of thinking.

When it comes to psychotherapy, there is a common misunderstanding that the psychologist is there to tell you what to do.  In other words, to give you advice. It’s a misunderstanding because giving advice is not what psychologists actually do. A psychologist’s role is far more complex than that.

2020, a year that will never be forgotten due to the COVID-19 Pandemic, has been a challenging year for everyone. It was certainly not the year that any of us expected and it is for this very reason – that it was so unexpected - that many of us have struggled.

When there are discrepancies between our expectations and reality, all sorts of distress signals go off in our brains. It doesn’t matter if it’s an annual holiday ritual or a more mundane daily habit like how you clean your teeth; if you can’t do it the way you normally do it, you’re biologically engineered to get upset. We really are creatures of habit.

Icebergs are deceiving because what you see on the surface is usually only a small fraction of what lies below.

Anger is exactly like an iceberg – it is easy to observe on the surface, but it has so many other hidden emotions below the surface.

"Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens.
Some things are up to us and some things are not up to us.
Our opinions are up to us, and our impulses, desires, aversions—in short, whatever is our own doing. Our bodies are not up to us, nor are our possessions, our reputations, or our public offices, or, that is, whatever is not our own doing.”
~ Epictetus ~
(Greek Stoic philosopher - 55 – 135 AD)

The Wellbeing Wheel is based on Systems Theory and is a useful tool to help us think about life in a circular way rather than a linear way.

The Wellbeing Wheel breaks our lives into eight different aspects, elements or categories and helps us to see that all the parts of our lives are linked to each other. When we plot our wellbeing on the wheel we can see at a glance which aspects we are paying attention to and which aspects we are not paying attention to, or neglecting in our lives.

 We so often complain about how busy we are and that there is not enough time for everything. But what is it that you are actually focusing on? Are you including all the things that are important and necessary for your health and wellbeing? If you are, then you will be living a life that is meaningful and leads to optimal health and wellbeing. If you are not, you will merely be filling your days with frantic busy-ness on a path to physical and mental illness.

This well-known story will inspire you to think about what you are spending your time doing.

Most people think that the word “extravert” describes a party person and the word “introvert” describes a shy person. For psychologists, however, the terms have a more accurate and complex meaning.

Most parents want their children to be happy and carefree. That’s understandable. The problem comes when a parent thinks that to be happy and carefree a child must have lots of friends and be doing lots of different activities.

It’s a problem because for the introverted child, being constantly active and socialising is stressful and exhausting.