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E-Quipped to... Improve Your Relationship With Yourself

This newsletter refers to “How’s Your Relationship With Yourself?”, a magazine article found on my website.

September is “Self-Improvement Month” and what better way to observe it than by literally improving your relationship with yourself?

Most of us put quite a lot of time, thought and effort into building and maintaining good relationships with others – our bosses, colleagues, friends and family – but pay little or no heed to our relationship with ourselves. By not attending to your relationship with yourself, you run the risk of being affected by external factors such as social media or peer group pressure.

Social media is often used to ridicule, criticise and humiliate. Only those with high self-esteem and emotional and psychological wholeness can withstand such attacks. For most others, it destroys the sense of self and can even cause severe emotional and psychological damage.

The good news is that even if your relationship with yourself has been neglected in the past, you can do something about it now.

Seven Ways to Improve Your Relationship With Yourself

Learn to be assertive – When you are assertive, you treat both yourself and others with respect and expect to be treated with respect in return. If you want to have a healthy relationship with yourself, it is good to be assertive.

Do not compare yourself to others – There will always be people who are more fortunate than you are, and there will always be people who are not as fortunate as you are – in every category (looks, ability, intelligence etc.) It doesn’t matter. You are you. Accept your uniqueness and strive to be the best YOU you can be!

Accept the parts you do not like about yourself – There will always be aspects of the self we do not like or wish were different. Change the things you can and accept the parts you cannot change. You cannot have a healthy relationship with yourself if you do not accept all aspects of yourself.

Learn to feel and label all your emotions – Don’t just block them out with distractions. The better you know and understand all aspects of yourself, the better relationship you can have with yourself.

Find meaning and purpose in your life – Viktor Frankl (Austrian Psychiatrist) says we all need to find meaning and purpose in life. Seeking just pleasure or power for ourselves leaves us unfulfilled and suffering from various mental illnesses. If you want to have a good relationship with yourself create a life that is filled with meaning and purpose.

Talk to a professional – we all have issues or so called ‘baggage’ and gaining insight into your own issues by talking to a psychologist or similar professional will help you grow mentally and emotionally. Knowing and understanding your own issues will enable you to meet your own needs and ensure you do have a healthy relationship with yourself and others.

Choose to take responsibility for who you are – who we are, is formed from the moment of conception. As a child, we are powerless to stop abusive or damaging relationships, but as an adult, we are not powerless. Never blame anyone else for who you have become. Look back on the past with gratitude for the lessons learned and choose to take responsibility for who you become in the future. Learn to love yourself and develop a good relationship with yourself going forward.

Based on my information journalist Kim Garner wrote the article: "How's Your Relationship with Yourself?" which appears in the Essays of Africa Magazine. You can read it on my website too. 

What do YOU Think?

Share your wisdom with others… What suggestions do you have to improve your relationship with yourself?

Leave your comments here.

About These Newsletters

You may have been forwarded this email by a friend. In that case, allow me to introduce myself. I am a psychologist, speaker, trainer, coach and hat lover based in Durban, South Africa.

My goal is to inspire you to make the changes necessary to live the life of your dreams! I believe that by developing your YOU-Q - the term I have created to describe your unique intelligence, creativity and wisdom - you can find your Inner winner and live a Be-YOU-tiful life right now.

On my website you'll find more ideas to get you thinking about life, love, work and other important STUFF.

Visit www.clairenewton.co.za 

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+27 82 491 1136
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